Rev Up Your Rapport

Rev Up Your Rapport

by Arnold Sanow MBA,CSP

Associate of The Lett Group

Arnold Sanow Get Along book


Rapport can be defined as “bringing agreement, harmony and accord to a relationship”.

Isn’t that what we want in our connections – to discover points of mutual interest or

common ground, reach agreements, live and work together in harmony and enjoy

interactions along the way- with more ease? Rapport is the magic ingredient for getting

along with our customers, co-workers, colleagues, committee members, families, friends,

neighbors and everyone else we encounter in any role, anywhere, anytime. Getting along

means smoother sailing, fewer hassles, and more fun!

The key to revving up rapport lies in expressing the same qualities that people find

attractive. It’s the pleasure/pain principle in action. We move toward the people we likethose

who are easy to get along with, who make us feel comfortable, who bring out our

best qualities (including our smiles, laughter and good feelings).

In the reverse, we move away from those who bring us discomfort- those with whom we

find nothing in common, or who grate on our nerves, make us see red, hold up our plans,

don’t meet our expectations, give us headaches, or provoke other negative responses.

The relationships that bring us pleasure and good experiences are likely to endear as well

as endure, generating fond memories, long-lasting impressions and joyful feelings. In

contrast, the relationships that bring us discomfort and cause negative experiences are

likely to test our endurance; although their accompanying impressions, feelings, and

memories may also last, we probably wish they wouldn’t.

The ability to rev up your rapport is critical to creating enduring connections. Without it,

you’re more likely to suffer the pain and stress of troubled relationships and

disappointing connections. You may also miss out on wonderful opportunities and their

power to transform. All are typical fallout from choosing a life of disconnection

According to the book, “Get Along with Anyone, Anytime, Anywhere … 8 keys to

creating enduring connections with customers, co-workers – even kids, by Arnold Sanow

and Sandra Strauss here are key traits you must focus on to rev up your rapport;

Authenticity Good communication skills

Appreciation Humor

Compassion Neat appearance

Confidence Positive attitude

Engaging style Social skills

Enthusiasm Respect

Friendliness Sincerity

Conversely, here are traits that typically turn people off or turn them away;

Abrasiveness Lack of humor

Apathy Negative attitude

Coldness Poor body language

Insensitivity Poor communication skills

Insincerity Poor social skills

Lack of appreciation Profanity

Lack of confidence Rudeness

Not only does rapport enhance your personal and professional relationships, it can also

boost your company’s bottom line. Communicating with insight, perception, and

empathy strengthens your efforts to keep customers happy, gain and maintain trust,

regain favor with disgruntled clients and customers and increase the likelihood of getting

their repeat business and their referrals. Likewise, building good rapport with colleagues

increases the quality of your working relationships, with corresponding impact on

productivity, creativity, cooperation, morale and overall job satisfaction.

As Norman Vincent Peale stated, “Getting people to like you is merely the other side of

liking them”

For more information about Arnold Sanow and how to book him for your next event, contact The Lett Group at or (301)946-8208.